Archive for December, 2006

CliffyB is m4h hero!

Wednesday, December 27th, 2006

Category: Fashion, Style, Shopping

Cliff Blezszinski’s name can be found in the 1st issue of Nintendo Power on top of the highscore list for Super Mario Bros. That, my friend, is when you know you’re destined to become a legendary video game badass.

10 things to do instead of smoking a cigarette

Thursday, December 21st, 2006

[Ed. Note--This entry has been edited to comply with the one-dick-joke-per-post rule.]Yeah, so remember how I said that I was going to go to Joe’s Bar and Grill today, on the advice of a magazine article? Well I did, and…I think I’m in love.

Oh, not with the mini-burgers, which are four for seven bucks, have a big slab of smoked gouda on them, and are, as nearly as I can tell, seasoned with pure dopamine. No, I could live without them–if I had to, although I’m not sure you could call it living–I could even live without the two-dollar-extra french fries, tossed with raw garlic, parsley, kosher salt and fresh ground black pepper.

What I will never forget, the image I will carry with me until the day I die, is my first sight of the “macaroni and cheese”. Eat & Drink Austin described it thus:

a combination of a classic béchamel sauce blended with five cheeses, suffused with gourmet franks, and topped with Italian breadcrumbs

The thing is, it’s better than that. First of all, it’s not even macaroni. It’s shells. And you normally think of macaroni and cheese as a side. This is an entree. It’s more expensive than the burgers. It’s $7.50. It’s like a fucking pound of macaroni with sliced sausages thrown in. It’s..It’s…I would have smeared it on my dick and made sweet, sweet love to it, but I know I would have just thrown a disk trying to lick the stuff off my own penis. That’s how good it was. I cried a little at the end.

Ten things to do instead of smoking a cigarette

10. Smoke some weed instead.

9. Drink some mushroom tea.

8. Go see the hippie trail of lights at 38th & Guadalupe, behind the Groovy Lube.

7. Watch the daily show.

6. Eat some macaroni.

5. Smoke some more weed.

4. Blog.

3. Think about how bad cancer sucks.

2. *** ***. *** ** *** ** *** **** * beer ***, **** ** * 6″ ****. ****: **** Important–******** ** throw *** *** ****.

1. Pass out and go to sleep.

Jehosah Jumpinfats!

Wednesday, December 13th, 2006

I added the pictures from my Townlakia IV set to Flickr:

PB106327

I love you Hachi!

Tuesday, December 12th, 2006

IMG_3617
I fucking love my fucking camera, too, man! It takes pictures in the fucking dark! 8718 pictures, and still tickin’!

Tuesday, December 12th, 2006

i am t3h tired.

I had a hella good time on my birthday. Thanks to all the people who came. I got drunk, but did not throw up, unlike Katie’s birthday last Friday, so I guess the party wasn’t as good. We did get all drunked up though.

I continue to think my Fedora is cooler than you are.

You should definitely go read Muhammed Yunus‘ Nobel Peace Prize Acceptance speech. I hate it when people who are smarter than me are also better at expressing their ideas more simply and clearly than I can.

It’s got more than a whiff of the fashionably radical about it, too. I’ll bet people in berets really like it a lot. They probably read his book already.

I will come to you at nightime
I will climb into your bed
I will kiss you in 195 places
As I go swim around in your head

I will squeeze the life right out of you
I will make you laugh, I’ll make you cry
And we may never forget it
As I make you call my name as you shout it to the blue, summer sky

And we may never meet again
So shed your skin lets get started
And you will throw your arms around me
And you will throw your arms around me

–Pearl Jam, Throw Your Arms Around Me

How to fill yo belly in da 4X.

Saturday, December 9th, 2006

It just occurred to me that I always talk about where I eat out downtown, and I don’t think I’ve ever even mentioned where to get fed in the best part of town there is, 78745. Here’s a few of my favorite places:

Hill’s Cafe: Best. Chicken. Fried. Steak. In. Town. Period. A big back yard with lots interesting stuff in it. Live music. Very country. Find it on South Congress.

Hao Hao: Most excellent Chinese and Vietnamese food. They deliver, too. Get an order of pot stickers while you’re at it. They live at the corner  of Manchaca and The Bill.

Madam Mam’s: Hella pimp Thai food from the drag replaces RJ Pitts at the corner of West Gate and Ben White. Eat the S2 Yum Nuer salad, and avoid going during the lunch rush unless you want to wait. For a long time.

Galaxy Cafe: This is my favorite place to eat. Technically, it’s in 78748, but, whatever. Beats the fuck out of Hyde Park Bar and Grill. Eat there at night when the decor looks the smoothest, and get the Bacon Bleu Cheese burger with macaroni and cheese on the side.

Milano’s Pizza: A pizza place at Stassney and South First so cool they don’t even have a web site. The delivery guys tend to be kind of stoned or something, so I’d check your order before they leave. Get a supreme, or something with tomatoes on it, because the tomatoes are the bomb. There’s no dine-in.

Taqueria Arandinas: This is the one at the corner of William Cannon and South First. Mexican Food: Good, Cheap. English: Not so much. Service: It’s a fucking taqueria, man! what do you expect!

Thai Kitchen: Located in the shopping center at William Cannon and I-35, where it serves up the yummy-style Thai food that makes it such a consistent winner in the Chronicle Polls. I don’t even know what to recommend. Try everything.

River City Donuts: Donuts! At the corner of William Cannon and Manchaca, in the same shopping center as Hao Hao.

If you notice a dearth of Mexican and Italian restaurants on this list, let me assure you that I do too. They’re all up in 78704.

Drunkination

Thursday, December 7th, 2006

Man, it’s been a night. I was going to post some pictures of me in my new fedora, and ask whether to keep it or lose it, but  I got drunk and asked about forty different women, so even if 97% of them are lying,  I should prolly still keep the hat, because they all said to keep it. *urp*

I saw that movie  Fuck: A Documentary. Highly recommended. I saw this quote from Leviticus where it was saying that those who curse should be stoned to death. Tough guy, that Leviticus. Like taking it up the ass? Stoned to death. Drop an F-bomb occasionally? Stoned to death. Harsh.

Went to plush after I watched the movie(s). There was this dubstep DJ spinning, and it was pretty pimp. I like to dance to it, ‘cuz it’s slow like hip-hop, and my old ass can keep up.

I’m gonna be 33 on Monday, still debating what to do.

I told this thick hispanic girl earlier that she danced like liquid poured into a people shape, and she said it was the nicest compliment she’d ever gotten. It made me kind of sad, because it wasn’t that good of a compliment.

This is the first thing I’ve written in a week. It looks to me like a bunch of incoherent shit, but at least I’ll be able to look back on this week when I’m old and remember what happened.